Love in the Present Tense

Morrie and Arleah Shechtman

Troubled marriages are all too common today. People continue to look for answers that can fix their relationship, but they don't find much beyond the usual fare. Drawing on a unique mix of expertise from working with employees to facilitate personal growth in the workplace in addition to couples workshops, the authors have developed a new approach that challenges common notions about what makes a good marriage work.

At its heart is an inspiring message: when partners commit to healing old wounds and strive for personal growth, they will greatly expand their capacity for intimacy.

Featured in:

• Family Circle
• US Weekly
• The Chicago Tribune

Table of Contents

Chapter 1:
Myth: Opposites attract—a couple, in their differences, complements each other.
Reality: Great relationships require identical core values.

Chapter 2:
Myth: Love will carry you through the hard times in a relationship.
Reality: It is shared values that pull you through a crisis.

Chapter 3:
Myth: You need to work on your marriage if you want it to be good.
Reality: Relationships don't have problems; people do.

Chapter 4:
Myth: Selflessness and giving to others build the best relationships.
Reality: Clear limits and boundaries build mutual respect and lasting relationships.

Chapter 5:
Myth: Unconditional acceptance of your partner is the foundation of a good marriage.
Reality: If you don't make demands on your partner, you don't really care.

Chapter 6:
Myth: Frequent conflicts are a sign that a marriage is in trouble.
Reality: Your willingness to engage in conflict determines the depth and quality of your relationship.

Chapter 7:
Myth: Spending lots of time together is very important.
Reality: The best relationships are low maintenance and high intimacy.

Chapter 8:
Myth: Trusting your partner is essential to a good relationship.
Reality: It is trusting yourself that is essential.

Authors

Morrie Shechtman is a psychotherapist, a teacher, a counselor, and now runs a successful management consulting company.

Arleah Shechtman is a psychotherapist with a clinical specialization and works with adolescents, small groups and with people experiencing grief and loss.